Monthly Archives : January 2019

  • Child Mediation Preparation

    Child custody has always been a sensitive matter for parents and children. The couple often discusses it when the pressures, conflicts, and emotions are very high.

    Parents and children usually become very overwhelmed by the idea of not living together anymore.

    Child mediation is the best solution to come up with a parenting plan for the children’s future. If you are considering child mediation, the following are some tips to help you prepare for this process:

    • Make a list of your concerns. Start preparing by writing down all the matters you would like to talk about during the mediation process. Also think about how you would like to resolve these issues. By making a list, you organize your thoughts. This enables you to cooperate and negotiate with a clear head.

    • Gather enough evidence. If you fear for your children’s safety or worry about their well-being, gather documents that can support your claims. More evidence can shorten the discussion.

    • Get the sample custody schedules and agreements ready. Before the mediation starts, you should know what you really want from the process. Do you want a joint custody plan, or do you want the kids to stay with you more? Create a sample plan that includes the days and times the kids will stay with you and with their other parent. Consider the kids’ school schedules, holidays, functions, and vacations. Understand that the sample schedule you prepare will still change because of the compromises you must make.

    • Stay calm about the process. Disagreements and confrontations are expected to happen during the mediation process. To have a successful child mediation, you should remain calm. This is the only way you and the other parent could come up with a final parenting plan that benefits everyone. Practice breathing exercises. Though it can be very frustrating, do your best not to lose your temper. Just be willing to make compromises and keep your mind open.

    • Talk to your lawyer. Tell your lawyer about your child mediation plan. Even if your lawyer cannot come with you during the mediation process, he or she will be able to come up with a good strategy. Child mediation can be grueling for the parents and the children. Make sure you remain collected.

    Always keep your children’s well-being in mind and by the end of the process, everyone will go home happy.

    Continue..
  • Trips, Traveling, and Vacation With Your Children Post Divorce

    After the divorce, family trips should still continue to be enjoyable and memorable. When moving forward, families will benefit greatly when both parents come up with a solid plan in regards to the vacation time with the children. Concrete plans help ensure certainty and stability in the child(ren)’s lives.

    In a comprehensive parenting plan you will be addressing parenting time for every vacation and holiday in which the children will either spend time with one parent or the other. This is one of the most critical pieces in how both parents will work out their co-parenting. During this time you will address logistics and decision making on behalf of your child(ren).

    Many questions may arise during this period and you will need to consider and limitations that one or both of you will need to consider Some of the questions that may arise are:

    Will there be a “significant other present” during these times?

    Who is allowed to travel with the children?

    How will communication take place between the parents and the children during traveling?

    Will the children be missing any schooling time?

    Serious consideration needs to be given during the developmental plan. This plan gives each parent the chance to voice preferences, thoughts, and concerns when it comes to co-parenting. Even if both parents are great at communicating, it’s always a great idea to use the child(ren)’s school calendar so that there is a default schedule so that certain expectations can be met when it comes to spending the needed or wanted time with the child(ren).

    Continue..
  • Mediation and Child Custody Cases

    Separation and divorce often result in an argument over the children. Custody issues are usually very difficult to deal with. It is too challenging to reach a decision when it comes to where the child should live, and which parent should exert effort in visiting the child. That is why many parents resort to working with a seasoned law mediator for such situations. Mediation Defined Child custody, support, and property division are some of the divorce-related issues that mediation helps settle. A third party, called the mediator, helps spouses resolve their disagreements during the divorce.

    Experienced attorneys who practice family law are those who become divorce mediators. They are the lawyers who have completed their specialized mediation training. They do not make decisions like the arbitrator or the judge. They merely help couples reach an agreement.

    Child Custody Mediation: Preparation Stage Below are some things to consider before you start the mediation:

    • Get some legal advice from an experienced lawyer. It is always best to be armed with the knowledge of your responsibilities and rights before you enter mediation.

    • List down the daily routine and schedules for your child and yourself.

    • Prepare your proposal for visitation and custody. Consider birthdays and holidays. Prepare details about transportation and exchange of locations for picking up and dropping off the child.

    • Compile all necessary records including letters from the child therapist, medical records, and report cards. Steps in Mediation Here are the common steps in the mediation process:

    • Set a meeting with the mediator

    • Point out and classify the challenged issues

    • Have an open mind as you discuss the solutions

    • Draft, finalize, and sign the final custody agreement.

    Remember that there are several factors in setting an amount of time you should spend on mediation. The willingness of the parents to reach an agreement is also a factor to consider. Mediation for child custody is not the venue to fight about the relationship’s errors. The mediation concentrates on the child’s future and the child’s best interests.

    Continue..
  • The Merits of Retaining an Attorney

    Retaining an attorney

    A lot of people will go through life basically flying by the seat of their pants. When they hit a rough spot, it seems to be the end of the world, but a little turbulence never hurt anybody. If you don’t want to take this route, especially when concerning your pending divorce or if you just like to plan ahead, talk to an attorney and put them one on retainer. This is the easiest way to ensure that that area of your life is protected.

    Retaining an attorney can give you the “Peace of Mind” of knowing that anything that pops up can be dealt with. While, some people tend to use an attorney more than others, it can be a benefit to everyone. Because, it’s never a good feeling to get surprised by a situation that could have been handled beforehand and having an attorney on retainer is a good start for that type of protection.

    Research

    If you’re looking for a good attorney to put on retainer, don’t forget to do your research. Don’t mistake kindness for skill. Make sure that your attorney has the right kind of knowledge that you may be needing. They can specialize in many different areas. Talk to your attorney and  make sure that they fit what you’re looking for. A lot of attorneys can come off as uncaring or brash. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that that means they’re not good attorneys.

    Friends

    Speak to your friends if any of them know a good attorney. This could help you decrease the research needed and make the  process faster. You never want to choose the first one you come across, always do some research to make sure you are getting a good deal and an experienced lawyer. You don’t want to wind up stuck in a bad situation, divorce or otherwise without anybody on your side. Keeping an attorney on retainer just makes good sense in most circumstances.

    Continue..
  • Essentials of Having a Family Mediator

    Disputes are not an easy to face and the best outcome is usually by family mediation. There are some that merely require a neutral friend or relative to resolve, but other disputes are more complicated. For far more complex issues, a professional mediator should intervene. These involve two people, but they may include other family members.

    One of the most common disputes is child custody. During disputes, conferences involve the meeting of the entire family. When mediation fails to settle the dispute, the parties must go to court, where a judge will make the necessary decisions. The court process is stressful, expensive, and long. Family mediation aims to prevent the problem from reaching the court.

    Separated families are encouraged to agree on terms in caring for their child or children without going through the court process.  When things are beyond simple discussions, a Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) steps in. Dividing properties and the children is never a pleasant step in resolving conflicts, but the separated family needs it for peace among its members.

    The Steps

    If only one party agrees, the mediation cannot push through. Once the parties agree to participate in family mediation, the process begins. Here are the steps:

    Individual Contact 

    The family mediator contacts the parties and arranges an individual meeting. The initial meeting enables the mediator to see each party’s level of readiness for the mediation. The mediator takes this opportunity to understand the issues and expound on the process of mediation.

    Joint Meeting

    Once the family mediator accomplishes the individual meetings, a joint meeting happens. Here, the parties will review a Contract for Family Mediation Services and sign it. After this, they all start discussing the issues they identified.

    Both Parties Contribute. During the mediation process, the parties work with the family mediator to deal with the following:

    • Explanation of the family’s situation.
    • Setting the mediation agenda. Each mediation session is designed based on what you prefer and what you must talk about.
    • Finding out the issues that you must talk about.
    • Prioritization of the given issues.
    • Setting the time scales for various matters.
    • Clarification of the issues to avoid any misunderstanding.
    • Finding out common ground.
    • Obtain and provide all the information that you need.
    • Consideration of all options available, especially when it comes to finances.
    • Arrival at the best option that best suits both parties. This includes working out the proposal details.

    By the time the family mediation ends, the family mediator will break down the steps in obtaining legal advice about the proposals both parties have come up. The mediator will also discuss how the parties can convert the proposals into a legal agreement or even a court order. Usually, proposals that concern finances are the ones that need a court order. When they concern children, they just need to be converted into legal agreements.

    Remember that the future of your children depends on how successful the family mediation is. Talk to your chosen family mediator and ask as many questions as you can. This way, you won’t go through the process unprepared.

    Continue..
  • Benefits of Family Mediation

    The most difficult conflicts usually come from the basic unit of society—the family. Since family matters most, it is important to resolve the issues within it immediately. Family mediation in Buffalo is considered one of the most common and effective ways for finding the best resolution. It arms the parties with the necessary tools for reaching an agreement that will benefit everyone concerned.

    When simple talks are not enough to resolve an issue between separated couples, Buffalo  family mediation steps in. A third party, known as the family mediator, helps the parties resolve their issues and settle their dispute. Though difficult, working together is essential to make family mediation work. The parties should cooperate while maintaining their sense of responsibility and self-control. After all, their children’s future and their peace of mind are at stake. Here are some of the known benefits of family mediation:

    •  It can start as soon as the couple announces their separation. Couples who are having trouble with their marriage can start their family mediation process just after they announce their separation.
    •  It usually results in an amicable separation. Through family mediation, the children and the assets are the focus. The couple decides who will have access to and who will have custody of the children. Family mediation also helps the couple divide the assets properly.
    • It provides a window for getting back together. A family mediator can help the couple reconcile if there is a chance for them to do so. Once the couple refuses to make up, the family mediator helps the parties reach an amicable separation. An amicable separation via family mediation is less stressful than a separation before a presiding judge.
    • It keeps any conversation that took place during the mediation is kept confidential. If the couple decides to undergo a painstaking separation or divorce, the court cannot summon the mediator as a witness. The couple can be confident that the court will respect the privacy of the mediation process.
    • It is non-adversarial. Though the couple wants to part ways as adversaries, family mediation still aims to reach a solution that is acceptable to both.
    • It open doors to a comfortable and safe environment. Both parties and their children can speak without the risk of being reprimanded or triggering an argument.
    • It encourages good co-parenting. The mutual decisions made by the parents during mediation save the children from any more emotional trauma and bitterness brought about by the separation.

    Family mediation in Buffalo is an important process that facilitates effective problem-solving and communication between the two parties concerned. It also helps the couple reach agreements that benefit both sides and their children. Choose your Buffalo family mediator well, so that you could go through the mediation process with confidence, and reap its benefits.

    Continue..
  • A Mediator to Solve the Issues

    If either partner in a divorce is fighting over custody of a child or parenting decisions, try a mediator. While most people have heard of a mediator, they may not be quite sure what they do or how to use them. A professional mediator is basically a neutral third party that will help the two parents discuss any issues at hand and make a decision.

    The mediator’s role is to get the discussion started by identifying the problems and then guiding the conversation. However, once a decision is made, a mediator is unable to give legal advice.

    If this is needed or a decision cannot be reached, it will then be up to the family court in their area to make the decision. On the other hand, if the two parents are able to come to a decision, a mediator can be a much more financially sound way of discussing the issues at hand. Of course, there are a few other reasons why a mediator may be preferred over the court. By settling something out of court, the parents have greater control over the parenting decisions that are made.

    If they can come to an agreement instead of having a judge make the decision, it will allow them to come up with their own terms and present them to the court for approval. This typically makes it a more satisfying environment for everyone involved and that is an important aspect of any case like this.

    When one party feels that they are not being heard, they are less likely to hold up their end of the bargain. That is one of the more frustrating things about going to court, the parents don’t have a lot of control over the outcome.

    An additional plus is that everything settled during a mediation is fully confidential. No one involved can discuss the issues raised with anybody else. Before going to court where children are involved, the divorcing parents should consider talking to a mediator in their area.

    Continue..
  • Someone to Mediate

    If you’re going through a difficult divorce or just trying to make sure that you get your fair share when you leave the marriage, it can sometimes be a little tricky. With so many of the dockets completely full, it can take some time to get your case heard in court. There is however an alternative available, try using a mediator. The mediators job is to hear all sides of the argument and creatively come up with alternatives so that everybody gets their fair share. There are somethings that you should know about mediation. For instance, a mediator is not a judge, he’s not there to make a judgment, his job is solely to listen to everybody’s case and come up with a solution that works for all parties involved. Sometimes they do have to be creative with the process, but a good mediator can also be a great asset.

    Also, any information the mediator is given is considered to be confidential. They are not allowed to discuss this with others and if for some reason the mediation fails, any statement that was made cannot be used at trial. The mediator can’t be compelled to testify for either side. Also, when a mediation settlement is reached, it is binding. Therefore, both parties should fully understand and agree that what they mediate is what they want. Especially if the decision involves children, parenting time or division of assets.

    The mediator will typically divide everyone up into separate rooms, so he can hear every part of the case separately. This allows him to hear everyone’s concerns one at a time. While, many cases do wind up in court, it is not the only option. If you are having problems getting your case heard, try to mediate and see if you can come to an agreement. Going through a divorce or custody hearing is difficult enough without adding more stress to the situation.

    Continue..
  • Filing for Divorce – Rebuild Your Life

    Divorce should be considered as a last resort to fix a relationship problem.  This type of procedure is very serious and it has to be a decision that is well thought out before attempting to start the process.  You need to make sure that you are ready for this type of drastic measure in order to help your relationship get better.

    When you are filing for divorce, you will want to notify the court that you are going to proceed with the dissolution of your marriage.  This is something that means you are not able to work the marriage out any more and you want to put it to an end.  You will file a summons and petition the court in your county.  Ultimately it is then in the courts hands and you will have to wait to hear when the actual hearing will be to determine the next step. 

    Before you decide to file for divorce, you will want to choose the proper state and county to file your papers.  In order to start your divorce proceedings, you will want to make sure that you are going to the right place first.  You must make sure that the divorce is occurring in the county where you or your spouse lives.

    You must make sure that you are ready for the long haul in a divorce. You will find that the proceedings will go on until a conclusion is reached about all of the issues that are brought up.  This can take a short time or a longer period of time depending on the issues and what each party is ready to do about it.  There are going to be many different alternatives in a divorce proceeding.  You will want to make sure that you are open minded and going in to the process with good intentions at the same time. 

    You may have to go to court in order to figure out what is best for you and you family. You may have to talk to a judge and let them decide for you if you are not able to come to a resolution together. The judge will take into consideration everything that is said so that he can make the best decision for everyone that is involved in the proceedings.  You may want to make sure that you are ready for this type of outcome to happen.

    You will probably find it to be necessary to hire and attorney to take care of the proceedings in your divorce. You will want to make sure that you are represented well so that you are not putting yourself at risk for coming up short in the end. You want have your message sent to the courts loud and clear so that you are able to make sure that your side of the story is heard.  There are many factors that have to be decided in a divorce hearing and you want to do your best to have it ruled in your favor. 

    The last thing that you should want to do is make the divorce a messy one. You should not want to make it hard for the other person just for spite. This is not a good idea because all it will do is add more stress on you and may even hurt your case. You want to make sure that you are doing what you can to make this procedure go as quickly and fairly as you can.  That would be best for everyone involved including you and the family around you. 

     

    Continue..
  • Preparing for Child Mediation

    Child custody has always been a sensitive matter for parents and children. The couple often discusses it when the pressures, conflicts, and emotions are very high. Parents and children usually become very overwhelmed by the idea of not living together anymore. Child mediation is the best solution to come up with a parenting plan for the children’s future. If you are considering child mediation, the following are some tips to help you prepare for this process:

    • Make a list of your concerns. Start preparing by writing down all the matters you would like to talk about during the mediation process. Also think about how you would like to resolve these issues. By making a list, you organize your thoughts. This enables you to cooperate and negotiate with a clear head.

    • Gather enough evidence. If you fear for your children’s safety or worry about their well-being, gather documents that can support your claims. More evidence can shorten the discussion.

    • Get the sample custody schedules and agreements ready. Before the mediation starts, you should know what you really want from the process. Do you want a joint custody plan, or do you want the kids to stay with you more? Create a sample plan that includes the days and times the kids will stay with you and with their other parent. Consider the kids’ school schedules, holidays, functions, and vacations. Understand that the sample schedule you prepare will still change because of the compromises you must make.

    • Stay calm about the process. Disagreements and confrontations are expected to happen during the mediation process. The have a successful child mediation, you should remain calm. This is the only way you and the other parent could come up with a final parenting plan that benefits everyone. Practice breathing exercises. Though it can be very frustrating, do your best not to lose your temper. Just be willing to make compromises and keep your mind open.

    • Talk to your lawyer. Tell your lawyer about your child mediation plan. Even if your lawyer cannot come with you during the mediation process, he or she will be able to come up with a good strategy.

    Child mediation can be grueling for the parents and the children. Make it while remaining collected. Always keep your children’s well-being in mind and by the end of the process, everything will be OK.

    Continue..